Campaign Strategy

I was not a political science major in college, but let me be clear: I intended to attack my opponent (my haggard campaign dresser) with the fervor of a certain senator from Illinois. As the weekend began, I had the hope that change would come to my dresser.

Commence with the requisite mudslinging (that is, the before pictures):

As you can see, the opposition was great. This dresser had a tarnished record. It was also gray. A true democrat through-and-through, I crossed party lines and painted this...RED!

In a red state:

The next step: slinging some mud, or rather "goop."

The brass was allowed to sit. I checked back the next day, and after the a thorough cleaning, the top brass emerged (thanks, in part, from some torturous tactics: I had to use Noxon 7!).

And now, my cabinet, fully assembled:

...And lest you question the financial contributions to my campaign, I offer up the details into the public record:

--cost of primer: about $7.00 from Home Depot
--sponge rollers (These were my own contributions; that is, I had these!)
--red paint (also a personal contribution)
--goop recipe (All "goop" items were in my pantry)

Finally, I poll the public: How did I do?